Share the Burden

I’ve been in this box of grief for so long that I began to feel myself detach from others, and I’ve been just trying to survive the days.

I’ve struggled to see the Lord working in my life or anything around me, even though I could speak words of comfort to others around me.

It was easier to speak life into others than live out mine.

All I could see was sadness. I felt like my world was this gray fog of gloom.

Then…Christmas morning our sweet, blind and deaf 17 year old Yorkie died. CHRISTMAS MORNING! We knew it was coming. She had been declining for months, and we knew it would be soon, but… CHRISTMAS MORNING!?

My focus was solely that “Christmas was now ruined.” How could we bury this precious dog that was such a huge part of our lives for so many years, and go home and still do Christmas with our girls?

Then…I changed my focus. I began thinking about all my recent prayers that I prayed over this dog. A DOG! I prayed over a dog!

I got to thinking that even our prayers about a dog were heard. God heard all my prayers and answered them IN the right time and ON the right day! Yes, it was Christmas morning, but the days leading up to Christmas, I had been praying that her last days with us would be peaceful and she wouldn’t be in pain.

The week leading up Christmas, she was just so sleepy, and we all got extra cuddling time, and the morning she passed, she was in Hubby’s arms. It was the most peaceful way to go. God heard my prayers and honored my wishes for an easy end.

Even with this shift of my thoughts, I still couldn’t seem to clear the haze of sadness from my eyes. God, and everyone for that matter, seemed so far away.

Still, I dragged myself to church and was checking in with “all my people” and got an update from a friend who has been battling cancer. Surgery was the next option and would be life-altering.

When I heard my friend say the words “they were holding off on surgery because the cells they tested had no signs of cancer”, I about fell on the floor. My prayers the week before were exactly this, “that none of the cells or images would show cancer and that no surgery would be needed.”

Can we say that was jaw-dropping news?!

All my prayers, said with my mustard seed sized faith, were heard yet again! AND TO THE WORD!

Here I am, just surviving the days in a shroud of sorrow, not really believing that I was important enough to be heard by a Great God who had more important things to do and more important people to listen to and He heard me!

THIS! THIS is the reason we share our burdens with each other! This is the reason we check in with friends! This is the reason we fall at the feet of our Lord and pour out our hearts for others. So we can share the weight of their burden, AND what a joy when those updates come and we can rejoice with them!

My friend had no idea that my faith had shrunk, and I was struggling to see the Lord working. My friend had just shared a burden, and I chose to carry the weight of it and go to our Creator on behalf of my friend.

When we share our burdens, the weight becomes lighter when we have people who care to talk the Lord about us.

Maybe had I shared my own burdens, my world would have seemed less gray, but what a Joy filled day I had today because I got to hear that our God had heard my prayers and answered them word for word.

My friend’s cancer journey is not over, but I know that I can go to the Lord, and He hears me, even if my faith is only the size of a mustard seed.