One Year Later-In loving memory of Fireball Brown
A year ago today, I joined a club I never wanted to be part of. One marked by loss, parties and events that felt like someone was missing, and waking up every day trying to balance grief with gratitude. Yet, in this unspoken fellowship of grief, I’ve found a hidden connection with unexpected grace, knowing glances, and wordless hugs that say “I’ll hold you up awhile” and a shared pain with others that says, “I’ve been there too.” Thank you, fellow club members, for the shared humanity in our stories of love and loss.
But still, there’s the date.
That one sharp day on the calendar that makes everything ache again.
I used to hear people talk about how long it had been since they lost someone and I’d quietly think, “I’m never going to keep track like that. That just sounds depressing.”
But now I get it.
You don’t choose to remember. The remembering chooses you.
It sneaks up. It sits heavy. It knocks the breath out of a regular Monday.
Time ticks on and there’s no pausing it.
You don’t mean to count the weeks or mark the date, but somehow you always know it’s coming.
Yet through it all, one thing remains true,
My dad is with the Lord.
As I said a year ago today, Daddy’s life and values were built on his faith.
He would want you to know that even if you are so blessed that you never have a bad day, you know that one day, this life will come to an end, and on that day, you will stand before God. Jesus Christ is the only thing that can prepare you for that day. Only by Christ’s death on the cross, sacrificed for our sins, and His Resurrection, are we able to get into Heaven.
His belief in God and by the example of how he lived his life, his family hopes and prays that you come to know the God that my Daddy knew.
Daddy is not gone. He’s just on the other side of Heaven, in the presence of Jesus…
…and because of that, grief is not the end of this story…
It’s just the middle.
Cowles Farm 