We are just a few months away from you turning another year older, and that means it’s time for another "Letter to my Girls". My babies, I can’t believe how grown you are. You are quickly approaching the ages when all I could think about was wanting to be a wife and a mom. I… Continue reading Parents have no clue
Author: CowlesFarm
Leaves, Light and Lessons
When I first started adding plants my living room window sill, I thought I was just filling my home with pretty leaves, but over time, I’ve realized that tending to them has been teaching me something much bigger. As my small window sill of a few succulents grew into quite a collection now needing plant… Continue reading Leaves, Light and Lessons
But God…
Grief has a way of pulling you into the darkest of shadows you didn’t know existed.Even on the clearest of days, it felt like a storm was hovering. The familiar routines of my faith... talking with Jesus, daily devotionals, and even coporate worship on Sunday mornings suddenly felt like I was trying to climb a… Continue reading But God…
The other side of Heaven: One Year Later
One Year Later-In loving memory of Fireball Brown A year ago today, I joined a club I never wanted to be part of. One marked by loss, parties and events that felt like someone was missing, and waking up every day trying to balance grief with gratitude. Yet, in this unspoken fellowship of grief, I’ve… Continue reading The other side of Heaven: One Year Later
When God feels silent
Sometimes your life changes so slowly you don't see the change until you wake up one day and you're questioning how you got here. When you have been hit with a quick tragedy or a slow daily loss, whichever way it happens you still feel like your guts have been ripped out and you either… Continue reading When God feels silent
Days of my dreams
Work trip today with my babies! These are the things that make this Momma heart happy...just being with my adult girls. When you think about what your life will look like before you have kids, there are dreams that every Mom thinks about. Usually, the big things come first in our thoughts, big moments like… Continue reading Days of my dreams
Share the Burden
I've been in this box of grief for so long that I began to feel myself detach from others, and I've been just trying to survive the days. I've struggled to see the Lord working in my life or anything around me, even though I could speak words of comfort to others around me. It… Continue reading Share the Burden
From Generation to Generation
We had two weddings this weekend. One a cousin and one a family so close, for many years, my girls believed they were actually cousins. One thing stood out to me this wedding weekend, looking at the guests in attendance. Our faith has been passed from generation to generation, and our God has been the… Continue reading From Generation to Generation
Death Date
I was one of those people who would hear others talk about the amount time that had ticked by since their loved one had passed away and I would think to myself, "Well I'm never going to keep track, that sounds depressing!" On the 24th of August, I was working in the store of our… Continue reading Death Date
I joined a club.
I joined a club. It's a club that no one signs up for and no one wants to be a part of. This club SUCKS (Sorry, Momma, I know you hate that word)! I joined the "Grief Club" on August 4, 2024, the day my Daddy ran to the arms of Jesus. I never wanted… Continue reading I joined a club.
Legends Never Die – The life of Fireball Brown
Some legends are created and told for decades. The story changes, the facts are distorted and embellished, and the people in the stories become heroic, mysterious, and mythical. When legends are born, they create a life filled with unforgettable memories. They follow their calling, all the while touching lives and inspiring others to learn from… Continue reading Legends Never Die – The life of Fireball Brown
What a Beautiful Life!
At age 22, I walked down the aisle to a man who made me feel good about myself, made me think life could be fun, and he was really cute to look at! I was full of young love, romance, and dreams. When we first got married, all we wanted was to be together. We… Continue reading What a Beautiful Life!
Letters to my Daughters
This "whole blog thing" started with letters to my girls. It began as simple notes to them when they were babies. I wrote about their milestones and how much I loved being their Mom! As they grew, my writing grew. The simple notes turned into letters for their big birthdays and things I wanted them… Continue reading Letters to my Daughters
Day One
The Dictionary describes "Day One" as "the first day or very beginning of something.". US slang, Urban dictionary, describes it as "A close, longtime friend, one who has been around since the beginning.". Someone who has been there since the beginning; through the good and bad times. Someone who, no matter what, has your back. Someone who has seen the good, bad, and… Continue reading Day One
Not Today Satan!
Lately, I have allowed the enemy sit at my table. He pulled a chair up across the table from me and has held my gaze. I've allowed him to tell me I'm not good enough. I've allowed him to bring doubt back into my daily life. I've allowed him to steal time from my day… Continue reading Not Today Satan!
Jesus Loved Judas.
Take just a minute, and go back in your mind to when someone hurt you. Think of that person and the hurt and the pain they inflicted on you. Maybe it was their insecurity, or lack of time they gave you, they criticized you, or betrayed your trust, or even abuse. NOW, imagine back to… Continue reading Jesus Loved Judas.
Jesus grieves with us
Talking about the smallest verse in the Bible today. John 11:35. "Jesus wept." The Bible records the story of resurrection of Lazarus. If you don't know the story here is a quick synopsis. Close friends of Jesus- Mary, Martha and their brother Lazarus. Lazarus was ill and Lazarus' sisters had sent word to Jesus, knowing… Continue reading Jesus grieves with us
Do Life Big!
I believe you can do anything and you will be the very best at it! Your life is intended to be so much more than you could ever think or imagine! God is not limited by our personalities or our character. He can take our simple ideas and our limited human lives and turn them… Continue reading Do Life Big!
Dear Class of 2022
While your parents may be the loudest applause tonight, as you walk across the stage, THIS momma is silently remembering your soccer games, baseball games, field trips, class parties, and you being in our home, many nights, celebrating our girls lives. Your graduation from high school may feel bittersweet, but this is not an ending.… Continue reading Dear Class of 2022
Never Laugh at Your Husband
NEVER LAUGH AT YOUR HUSBAND. Hubby loves chocolate milk for breakfast. Some mornings that's all he has until lunch. Yesterday, he just poured the milk into the chocolate syrup bottle and shook it up. (Btw, if you ever want to prank your coworkers this is a great way- coworker thought he was just drinking chocolate… Continue reading Never Laugh at Your Husband
We’ve got your six!
From the moment I first saw you, you were smiling. You were the happiest baby I've ever met. When you were born, the first thing I noticed about you was your perfectly shaped lips. Lips that would grow to be encouraging, funny and say some of the most quick witted comments. You have made us… Continue reading We’ve got your six!
Things Every Kid Needs to Hear from Their Parents!
We all have influence, no matter our age. You may think you have no influence, or you don't matter, but you do! You changed the world by just being born, and every day of your life, you matter! You bring a light to this world that was not present on this earth until you were… Continue reading Things Every Kid Needs to Hear from Their Parents!
Christmas Sunday Moms
Sunday morning was Christmas Sunday, the Sunday right before Christmas. Little girls in frilly dresses. Little boys tugging at the tie mom made him wear. It is the last Sunday that we can hand out our gifts and Christmas cards to our church friends. The Sunday service is for rejoicing and remembering the real reason… Continue reading Christmas Sunday Moms
Jesus First
Have you ever waited a long time for an answer that felt like it was never going to come? Have you shared a concern to a friend, only to discover that you are now more impatient than you were before you shared your fears? Have you talked about your problem to friends more than you… Continue reading Jesus First
See Yourself Through My Eyes
In June, I found out my youngest threw away her art pieces... in the school dumpster!!!... on the last day of school. I was not happy! She said they "weren't good". I told her that "I deem what is good". She just smirked at me and I said her full name and shook my head. … Continue reading See Yourself Through My Eyes
Holding back from moving forward.
My youngest starts her senior year of high school this week, and my oldest starts her first year of college. I feel like I'm the mom in the driver's seat that has just slammed on the breaks of the car and thrust my arm out to stop her and protect her. I'm wanting to hold… Continue reading Holding back from moving forward.
Sitting in the Grief
One of my personality goals is "to be a help". It's how I view the world. I see needs, I fill them. You are stressed? Have a sick one in your family? Out of work? Whatever it may be, let me take some of it from you. I'll make you a meal. I'll watch your… Continue reading Sitting in the Grief
Best Part of Your Day?
When the girls were little, as we did our bedtime routine, one of the last things I would say before I walked out of their room was, "What was the best part of your day?" I started saying it as a way to distract them from the desire to stay awake. What kid doesn't hate… Continue reading Best Part of Your Day?
Dear Class of 2021
While your parents may be the loudest applause tonight, as you walk across the stage, THIS momma is silently remembering your soccer games, baseball games, field trips, class parties, and you being in our home, many nights, celebrating our girls lives. I still see some of you in Kindergarten, when I would come to help… Continue reading Dear Class of 2021
Be still… so God can move
I read about a lady who decided that she was going to be completely still for a few minutes a day for 14 days. I read through her daily notes while she was trying this experiment. The first few days were hard. She would wiggle. She would try to not think, but thinking happened. She… Continue reading Be still… so God can move
Simply “Thursdays”
My favorite day of the week is Thursday. When I tell people that, they usually laugh and ask, "Why Thursday?" My response has always been, "because it's so close to the weekend and the anticipation of what's to come is so great.... ... but then Friday comes and goes and before we know it's Sunday… Continue reading Simply “Thursdays”
Living a lie or Desiring God?
I like happy and joyful things, so writing this is hard for me. I claim to be "real". I claim to want to share my thoughts and feelings about my motherhood and I encourage others to "just be real". However there is this part of my thought life that I don't like to share. The… Continue reading Living a lie or Desiring God?
Your Future Has Begun!
When you were born, I looked into those big blue eyes and I saw so much. Eyes that were taking it all in. Eyes that were so inquisitive. Eyes that just wanted to see it all and experience it all.You always were a kid who wanted to please. You wanted to be the best and… Continue reading Your Future Has Begun!
A Family Promise
I cried myself to sleep the other night with feelings of nostalgia. I was thinking how quickly the girls have grown. I remembered how every birthday I would trace their little hand, and see how big it had gotten that year. I was thinking about how lately they are driving all over the place and… Continue reading A Family Promise
“This house does not run Itself!”
I am a wife of a very caring, loving husband who is my friend and we are raising our girls to recognize that the household does not run itself! We all work together to keep it going. You've heard me say before, this family does life together. That includes working together, (YES, we work at… Continue reading “This house does not run Itself!”
The Last Days that I missed
This weekend we did a tour of a college. The whole time I'm walking around this school and listening to the guide, I'm looking at both my girls and realizing that at some point they stopped looking like my little girls and looked like grown college students. They fit there. They looked like college kids.… Continue reading The Last Days that I missed
“DRIVING HEAD ON” into a new relationship with my daughters
My baby...my itty bitty...who is now inches taller than me, got her driver's license! The places she can go, the experiences she can have...now she can have them without me by her side.Oh the fear! Not the fear of her driving, (although there is always the safety concern) but the fear that she is growing… Continue reading “DRIVING HEAD ON” into a new relationship with my daughters
Father’s Day
S passed her driver's test today. My Dad taught me to drive. My hubby is teaching our girls to drive. Hubby is the right person to teach our girls to drive. While my dad tried so hard with me and put so many hours into teaching me, I still drive like I'm training for a zombie… Continue reading Father’s Day
What I see in my 16 year old S!
How in the world is my baby 16?! From the moment I first saw you, you were smiling. You were the happiest baby I've ever met. Giggly, loving the entertainment from your 1 year old big sister and Max the dog. I have learned so much about life and people from watching you and how… Continue reading What I see in my 16 year old S!
I am Woman hear me roar!
I just heard my youngest say to a group of boys, "Yes, I'm a girl!". She said it with pride. See, she was playing a video game with some friends and they couldn't believe that "a girl" was "THAT GOOD" at video games. (She also got the passion award in school for geometry this year.)… Continue reading I am Woman hear me roar!
She Believed She Could
There is this very common phrase out there that says, "She believed she could, so she did." This is my new favorite shirt. While I believe that we women can do anything we put our minds to, I do believe that I can NOT do it without the Lord. I need Him in every aspect… Continue reading She Believed She Could
Seeing the world from other lenses
Picture this...I have a pair of glasses on that can only see green colors. All the other colors are seen as gray. Now, you have a pair of glasses on that only see blue. You can't see my green colors and I can't see your blue colors. Well, what would happen if we traded glasses?… Continue reading Seeing the world from other lenses
Home Intruder or is it just the Dog?
Our dog, Minnie, has been very confused over the past few weeks on who to go to for her needs. Since spring break and this virus quarantine, T has been her main caretaker and she looks to T, when she wants fed even when I'm home. The last few nights she's been leaving our room… Continue reading Home Intruder or is it just the Dog?
Keep your eyes on Jesus
Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there. But the boat was now in… Continue reading Keep your eyes on Jesus
Do Battle with Worship
I'm the Nursery Director at our church. I love being the Nursery Director. I love the kids. I love the parents. I love the volunteers. I enjoy getting to know each of them. My desire for the parents of these little ones, is that they get a chance to step into the worship service and… Continue reading Do Battle with Worship
Enneagram and Christians
Some dear friends introduced me to the ENNEAGRAM and I'm learning a lot about myself. I'm learning about what motivates me and why I do the things I do. It's helped give a "name" to things and helps me correct certain behaviors. Enneagram in the Greek language simply is Ennea=9, Gram=Diagram. The Enneagram is a 9… Continue reading Enneagram and Christians
Marrying the WHOLE family
I've heard it said that when you get married, you marry the whole family. For some people that is terrifying. For me it wasn't. You want your spouse's family to like you and it can be so nerve-racking when you "meet the family". Hubby kept telling me "they will love you" but of course I… Continue reading Marrying the WHOLE family
“DRIVING FORWARD” into a new relationship with my daughters
My oldest took her driver's test today. As with most parents, there are new fears when your teen starts driving, but after driving with her in a most recent snow storm I realized that I've moved into a new relationship with my girls.I've always been one of those mommas who tried to suck up every… Continue reading “DRIVING FORWARD” into a new relationship with my daughters
Don’t judge your neighbors
For the past 3 nights, when I put our dog out to go potty before bed, I've been noticing that the neighbors behind our house have been standing and staring out a window and looking at our house. The first night I thought, is he looking at me? Can he see me in my pjs?… Continue reading Don’t judge your neighbors
What I’ve learned from my Little Sister
My sister is one of the strongest, funniest, sassiest, beautiful women you will ever meet. She is goofy, and fun and tries makes everyone have a good time. She hates awkward moments and will try to make a joke and make the moment more lighthearted. I lived with her for almost 22 years and she… Continue reading What I’ve learned from my Little Sister